


How many calories?

by Hannah2003



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Anorexia, Baby!Dan, Hospitals, M/M, Pet Names, Recovery, Swearing, bullmia, daddy!Phil, daddy/dom relationship, discorvery, throwing up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-07-07
Packaged: 2019-05-26 03:30:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14991794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hannah2003/pseuds/Hannah2003
Summary: Dan becomes anorexic after a innocent comment phil makes.





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter one:

He’s not entirely sure why the comment triggered him so much, but it’s been lodged in his mind for a while now, and he can’t seem to shake the thought that maybe,just maybe, phil’s correct and that it was his way of telling dan without hurting his feelings?

Flashback:

‘Oh god have I missed this baby’ phil purred,practically ripping dans shirt off him and attaching his mouth to Dan’s slightly tanned chest. Dan moaned and gripped Phil’s hair slightly and tugged. Phil had been so busy recently with work,so they hadn’t really had anytime together and god dan felt like he was going mad. The minute phil has told him he was done striking the deal dan had pounced on him, and phil was equally as excited. He’d missed dan. Missed being able to mark him as his. Missed hugging him from behind while dan was asleep. Missed dan pestering him for a new dummy or a new soft toy. He’s just missed dan.  
Phil gently nuzzled his head into Dan’s tummy and rubbed his hands on his thighs.  
‘Oh baby, your so soft and squishy..’ phil murmured, pressing a soft kiss to Dan’s tummy. Dan stopped short and blinked at Phil. Was he calling him fat?  
Phil didn’t seem to notice Dan’s mini freak out as he continued to glide his tongue over his body. Dan recovered quickly, and tried to focus on the feeling of phil gently squeezing his thighs and hips, but he couldn’t get the thought out of his head that phil thought he was fat.   
Dan moaned softly as phil sucked marks onto his skin and arched his back ever so slightly, his worries completely disappeared as phil looked up at him with lust filled eyes.  
‘Now baby boy, let the real fun begin..’

Flashback end:

Looking back on it, Dan knows phil didn’t mean anything by it, he knows rationally that phil loves his squish almost as much as he loves Dan, but the niggling thought that his own boyfriend could think he was fat, was still in the back of his mind, which makes him do something he seriously regrets not long after.  
‘I’m not hungry Phil’


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two:

It starts off as just skipping meals,missing out on dinner every now and again, saying he ‘doesn’t feel good’ or ‘his stomach hurts’ to get phil off of his back. It just starts off as cutting back on meals slightly. Not snacking so much throughout the day. Maybe going out on a walk more. Its nothing to worry about.  
Until it is.   
Phil doesn’t notice at first. He lets dan do his own thing mostly,not wanting to be one of those daddies that boss their babies about too much. He lets it slide the first few times Dan skips dinner, he doesn’t get concerned the first time Dan goes to his room with a ‘tummy ache’ and misses dinner. He doesn’t get concerned when Dan suddenly says he’s going on a walk even if it is out of the ordinary for Dan. He doesn’t get concerned. So Dan continues.  
************  
‘Hey baby, you feeling okay?’   
I’m sitting in the Center of the living room, with Winnie the Pooh playing on the tv, surrounded by stuffies, when Phil walks in.  
‘Yes daddy..’ I murmur, gently sucking on my pacifier. Phil sits on the sofa and pats his lap, so I quickly stand and settle myself into Phil. He gently runs his fingers through my hair and kisses my nose, making me giggle.  
‘Tickles daddy..’ I mutter, squirming in his lap.  
‘Ah ah ah, no wriggling now baby, don’t want daddy getting a little problem now do we?’ He says, gently tapping my waist. I nod and snuggle into his chest. His arms wrap around me and I feel calm. Until Phil ruins it.  
‘You haven’t been eating much lately have you Baby?’ He asks and I instantly stiffen. I’ve been ‘fasting’ for about a month now, and I thought Phil didn’t notice. He never mentioned it once to me, so I just presumed he didn’t notice or didn’t think it was a big deal. Which it’s not.  
‘Not a big deal daddy’ I mutter, trying to wriggle out of his lap, but he tightens his grip on me.  
‘No baby, this is serious. Are you really feeling that sick that you can’t eat?’ He asks and I breathe a small sight of relief. At least he hasn’t caught on the real reason I’m doing it. At least not yet.  
‘No,I’m okay now..’ I mutter.  
‘Okay okay, so how about some mac n’ cheese for tea tonight?’ He’s testing me I think,he’s clever like that. I nod slowly and he gently lifts me off his lap into the kitchen, where he places me on the counter.   
‘Comfy baby?’ He asks,gathering sauce pans out of the cupboards and getting the ingredients we need out. I nod at him.  
‘Use your words baby’ He says, coming to a stop in front of me and holding my knees gently.  
‘Yes daddy’   
‘Good boy’ He says and I glow with pride.  
**********  
‘Your not eating’ Phil says, staring at me.  
‘Do you feel sick? Or is the food no good?’ He asks and I shake my head.  
‘No no.. it’s fine Phil really,I’m just not very hungry right now’ I stammer,I’ve barely ate any of the food on my plate, maybe a few forkfuls of mac n’ cheese altogether, but I haven’t touched the slice of bread he gave me or my milk. He sighs.  
‘Dan, you’ve barely touched your food’ he stands suddenly and I cower slightly, thinking I’m going to be punished, but he just takes the fork from my hand and separates me food, so two half’s aren’t touching. He lifts a forkful up to my mouth.  
‘I want you to finish at least one half of this okay princess? Then you can go play’   
I look at the plate of food and wonder for a split second if phil would understand if I said I couldn’t eat it, but I know he would just get worried about me and over re-act. Hundreds of people diet every year, why should Phil worry about me?   
I manage half the food and two bites of the bread and phil praises me and kisses me all over, promising he will buy me a new stuffie when he next goes into town.  
Which is why I feel so guilty later that night when I shove two fingers down my throat and throw all my food back up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter coming tommorrow!! Hope your enjoying this!!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

It’s been three weeks since I started throwing up, and I honestly think I’m starting to get used to it. I eat my food, wait a few minutes before I dash to the toilet. Then I proceed to stick two fingers down my throat until the gloopy liquid comes back up and into the toilet bowl. Then I spit the excess out, wipe my mouth, flush the toilet and then wash my mouth out. It takes about ten minutes in total and phil hasn’t noticed a thing, which I’m happy about. The only thing that’s not so good about it is, our sex life’s sort of.. stopped. He tried to ‘get it on’ a few weeks ago, but I was in a mood so I pushed him off. He made it up to me with some new stuffies but I felt guilty. Still, I’m doing this for the both of us, to make myself happy and thin and to make Phil be proud to be with me, a thin boyfriend instead of the fat one that was me a few months ago.

******  
I fainted today. I went to get a drink from the kitchen when my vision went blurry and everything faded in slow motion and the next thing I know, I’m on the floor with a banging headache and Phils by my side.  
‘Dan? Baby are you okay? Oh god dan please answer me!’ I can vaguely hear phil yelling and it’s hurting my head so I whimper slightly and crack my eyes open a little. The bright kitchen lights blind me and I immediately close them again.  
‘Dan? Dan can you hear me?’  
I whimper again and I must have said something about the light as suddenly there’s just a soft glow from the oven, the rest of the room is black. I open my eyes more and see phil, with messy hair and glasses, leaning down.  
‘Dan? Dan I need you to stay still okay? There’s glass everywhere and I can’t have you cutting yourself on it, can you stay still for me?’ Phil asks and I try a small nod, but the movement jars my neck and I cry out.  
‘Dan I know it hurts but I need to move the glass before I can get to you, please stay still for me.’   
Glass... why is there glass? Oh yes, I wanted water. Water. I’m thirsty now.   
‘..water?’ I whisper and suddenly my mouth feels like the Sahara.  
‘I’ll get you some in a minute,baby. Almost cleaned up now’   
I vaguely register the sound of a brush and suddenly Phils holding my hand.  
‘Can you sit up baby? I need you to sit up’  
I weakly manage to prop myself up slightly without damaging my neck even more, and murmur that my head hurts.  
‘I know darling, you must have hit your head on the tiles when you fell. Can you hold this glass of water for me? No scrap that, your shaking too much, I’m going to grab a straw okay? Stay there sweetie.’   
Phils being nice. Nice Phil. Good phil. Phil my good boyfriend. Phil...  
‘Dan? Don’t fall asleep on me please? I need to look at your head.’  
He hands my the glass and I gladly take the straw between my teeth and let the cool liquid wash over my dry mouth, then Phils gently guiding the glass out of my hand and moving to look at my head. I moan out as my neck jars again.  
‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry,there doesn’t seem to be any damage, but I think it’s best if we go to hospital dan, just to be sure okay? Can you stand baby?’  
Baby. I want to be a baby. I’m Phils baby!   
‘No..no, want stuffie and dummy..’ I make grabby hands at him but he firmly grabs my hands and pulls them to his chest.  
‘No, no little space, not right now Dan. I need to get you to hospital and I can’t have you crying about a dummy while the nurses check you over. Can you be big for me?’   
I nod but I’m silently crying. I really want to be little right now and forget all my worries and be with my daddy. But that’s not happening.  
I force myself out of little space ( though normally phil says this isn’t good for me,but I’m too tired to argue and Phils clearly too worried.) and allow phil to carry me to the sofa where I lay for a further 10 minutes until the taxi arrives. Then we travel to the hospital and all I can think about is that they’re going to find out about me skipping back on meals.  
They’re going to find out. The little voice inside my head says. They’re going to find out and Phils going to hate you and leave you. You couldn’t ever loose Enough weight for him dan, you’re too weak.   
I’m ashamed to say that I’m starting to believe it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter on Sunday!!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

After arriving at the hospital they confirm that I’m okay, but they want to keep me in over night ‘just in case’. And thankfully they don’t seem to question my sudden drastic weight loss, but I suppose that’s a good thing, right?  
Wrong, I guess I spoke too soon. When phil goes to the toilet, the doctor closes the door after him and looks at me.   
‘So Mr Howell. We noticed that you seem that have lost quite a lot of weight recently.. are you aware?’ I gulp.  
‘I’ve been stressed lately... I guess I forgot to eat sometimes.. but my boyfriend.. phil.. is helping me de- stress..’ I stammer and the doctor narrows his eyes.   
‘We offer help Mr Howell, we just want to help.’  
‘ I know’ I say, and I do know, obviously. But I don’t need there help, I’m dieting, nothing major.. yes okay maybe making myself throw up isn’t the best way to go about it, but who are they too judge me?   
‘I’ve honestly just lost abit of weight due to stress, work and everything. You know how it is don’t you doc?’ I try so slip in a joke, but he doesn’t look convinced.   
‘Are you sure your fainting spell wasn’t because you haven’t had anything to eat?’ He asks and I feel myself go light headed.  
‘No.. why would it be?’ I start to sweat.  
‘Mr Howell, we need to know if your fainting spell was because of lack of food intake. It’s a serious condition sir, and we like to catch it as early as we possibly can.’ It’s already too late. I’m in it so deep already. ‘ Mr Howell we just want to help you get better.’  
‘There’s nothing to help’ I snap.  
‘Mr Howell..’ he starts but he’s interrupted by the door opening and phil entering.   
‘Hi, sorry it took so long. This place is like a maze! I forgot.. wait did I miss something?’ Phil asks, looking between us.  
The doctor looks at me and I take a deep breath.  
‘Nothing.. I’ve just lost a bit of weight lately due to stress and the doctor was a little worried, but honestly everything fine.’   
The doctor looks at me for a long time and for a minute I think he’s going to tell phil that he thinks I have an eating disorder or something. Which is a complete lie. I’m just watching what I eat, right?   
But the doctor keeps his mouth closed and instead nods, keeps his lips in a tight, thin line.   
After he leaves, phil sits on the edge of my bed and takes my hand.  
‘Was that all the doctor asked you? Because you do look thinner..’ Do I? Do I look thinner?  
‘Yeh phil, nothing to worry about’ I smile because it’s true isn’t it? I’m fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! So I hope your enjoying this so far!! I think I’m going to make it about 10-12 chapters but I don’t know yet.   
> I’m going to upload every 2 days now, so the next chapter will be on Tuesday but I think on Thursday I will upload a new story, one that I’ve been working on for quite a while, but I don’t know yet :)  
> If anyone is struggling with an eating disorder,whenever it be you or a friend please get them/you help as I would hate for anyone of you to be in pain, remember someone always cares, even if that someone is anonymous!! :)


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

They let me out of hospital the next day, though the doctors keep giving me sideward glances. I try to ignore it.  
Phil takes me to star bucks first, but I Moan and complain about ‘the sugary goodness making me sick’ until he relents and just lets me get a water. He has a iced coffee and I sit there glaring at the drink and phil. Why is it so unfair? Phil eats twice as much as me and yet he’s still skinny as hell and he’s still attractive. How is it that one gets everything and the other nothing?

When we arrive home we crash out on the sofas, just chilling with our laptops on. I end up lying across Phils lap while he edits a video but hey, that’s just us.   
He ends up playing with me for a few hours before dinner. He takes me to my room, or what the viewers think is my room, and takes the box from under my bed that’s full of toys and baby things. We play a complicated game with my bears, then we do some colouring with me yelling every-time phil goes out the lines (I swear he does it on purpose) then he wraps me in a blanket and rocks me while I suck on a bottle of Ribena and reads me a Winnie the Pooh story. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever had more of a perfect day, minis all the hospital stuff. But then it’s tea time.  
He serves up a small plate of rice and sweet corn for me, but I only manage half the bowl, complaining that I’m tired from the hospital and just want to sleep. He allows me to go to bed, but then he comes into my and cuddles me. Even though it’s still light outside, phil falls asleep pretty quickly. But I stay awake for hours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so short!! I’m trying to finish this story by next week, maybe next Thursday? Anyway I might upload a different fic I’m working on this Thursday, or might be another Chapter of this, who knows? ;)


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

I’m not fine.  
I don’t know how it came to this. Sitting In the bathroom at 4 am, making myself vomit again and again. Funny how the world works.  
Phil made a great meal, I’ve been in little space for a few days now so Phil’s been making me my ‘baby food’ and tonight’s food was fish fingers and peas, but as soon as the first spoonful of peas touched my lips, I knew it couldn’t eat it. I tried to get out of eating it, saying that I didn’t feel well but phil said he would let me lie on the sofa if I ate half the peas and one fish finger. It made me feel sick every-time I swallowed the food but I did it. For phil.   
I don’t even hear the pattering of his feet until a cool hand is being pressed to my forehead. I push my head forward and breathe deeply.  
‘Dan? Dan I’ve got water for you here, can you lean back and drink some for me?’ Phil asks and I nod weakly. I gulp at least half of the water before I refuse anymore. Phil flushed the toilet for me and gently wipes my mouth with some toilet roll, then he presses a cold flannel to my forehead and holds me. Rocking me to and fro. I lean into his chest and cry silently into his shoulder.  
‘Baby? Can you look at me please?’   
I drag my eyes up to meet his. Brown eyes meet blue. And I see the pain and anger flash in his eyes. Which scares me. Phil never gets mad.   
‘Dan.. I don’t know how to word this but.. did you make yourself throw up?’ Be asks and I swear my whole world stops.  
‘W..what?’ I try my best to look innocent and sweet but I can feel the mask slipping.   
‘Dan I saw your hand. Two fingers were wet. I’m not stupid’ he snaps and I cower away from him, but he holds me tighter.  
‘I’m not-‘ I start but he shakes his head. He’s silent for a long time.  
‘I’m.. I’m not mad Dan’ he says softly, dragging his fingers through my hair.   
‘Just.. upset’   
‘I.. I never meant for it to happen.. it just.. did I guess’ I stammer and phil Tilts my head.  
‘Meant for what to happen Dan? I need to know what’s going on.’   
I start crying again but this time a bundle of mixed up words come storming out my mouth.  
‘I don’t know, you said I was soft and squishy once when we were having sex and I just.. I just thought it was your way of saying I was fat. And I know I’m fat. I’m so disgusting it’s unreal. How could I let myself get this fat? How didn’t I notice? But it’s okay, it’s fine. Because now I’m sorting it out. I’m fine. Everything’s fine right phil? I should thank you, because without you, I would never have realised how disgustingly obese I actually am. So thank you.’   
I continue crying, but now I’m struggling to breathe slightly and I can see phil getting worried.  
‘Dan? Baby calm down, it’s okay I understand. Breathe with me.’  
It’s so much harder to get my breathing right when I’m in little space, but I try because Phils not mad. He hasn’t called me fat yet. He hasn’t thrown me out. Maybe everything really will be okay.  
Maybe not.  
‘But dan.. oh god baby your not fat! Your skin and bone Dan, you’ve never been fat and I doubt you ever will.’  
But I know he’s lying.  
‘It’s okay phil, you don’t have to lie to me’   
‘Dan.. I’m not lying! Look at you! You’re.. you're fading away..’ he pushes me towards the mirror and I see what I always see. A fat, ugly kid with a weird hairstyle. I look away.  
‘Dan..’ he starts but I push he away.  
‘No phil, no. Your wrong. Your just saying it cause your nice. But I know what your thinking. I know I’m fat and ugly and horrible. But I’m trying to change that.’  
Phil just stares at me blankly and I see the tiniest bit of heartbreak flash over his face.   
Then it’s gone.  
I can’t help but think I’ve just ruined us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi so I’m uplaoding this today as I’m going out all day tomorrow after school so I won’t have time!! The next chapter will be on Sunday!! I might upload a different fic on Saturday ;)


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

I don’t talk to phil for days. Everything he comes into the same room as me I leave and go to another, whenever I get up to go to the bathroom and he tries to corner me, I run off and lock the bathroom door, when I go to get water from the kitchen and he blocks the exit, I cower away from him until he moves from the door, and then I make a break for it. He’s agitated with me and I don’t blame him. He just found out about my ‘dieting’ and now he’s trying his best to make me stop. But I won’t let him. I refuse. I’m going to fix this and make myself pretty and thin because that’s what normal people do isn’t it? They loose weight?   
I’m honestly so lost.

Phil corners me in my room the next day, and he had to catch me on a little day. Of all the days.  
‘Dan?’ He asks, leaning in through the doorway. I look up from my drawing. He looks paler than usual and tired. I’m sure I look similar.  
‘Yeh daddy?’ I ask and I see him sag slightly.  
‘Can.. can we talk baby?’ He doesn’t wait for an answer, just comes and sits on the edge of my bed.   
‘I need to know what’s going on baby. I need you to tell me what’s happening in that head of yours.’ He gently taps the side of my head before cupping my chin.  
‘Please tell me Dan, I want to help’ he begs and I loose it.  
‘I don’t know what to do phil. Everything’s falling apart and I’m just.. drowning in it all. Every-time I eat I feel fat and ugly and I need to throw it back up. I need to. Im not crazy. Tell me I’m not crazy.’ I beg clinging onto his shirt and crying.  
‘Your not crazy princess, just a little damaged.’ Phil softly runs his hands down my back and I calm slightly.  
‘But baby, you have to eat. It’s part of life and growing. Food doesn’t make you fat, only certain foods do darling. And cutting out every single piece of food isn’t good for your body. You need food sweet, to grow and be strong, like a big boy’ he squeezes my arms in his hard hands as he says this and I nuzzle my head further into his neck.  
‘Please dan, I can’t have you deteriorating like this anymore. I’ve been so blind. I knew you weren’t eating, but I brushed it off. I’ve been so damn stupid about all this but I promise I’m going to help now. Just let me help you.’   
How can I? When I know he’s lying? All food makes you fat! I can’t eat and he can’t force me too either.   
But all I do is nod.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! So next chapter is going to be on Tuesday hopefully! I’m also currently working on another fix that I think is going to be uploaded in the next 2 weeks!!


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

It’s been three weeks since phil found out about my little ‘problem’ and everything’s changed. Phil wakes me up early everyday, around 10am (which is far too early for me) makes me a small breakfast of either cereal or pancakes, then we watch some tv (usually an anime) for about an hour before we shower and or bath together. Then we get on with our own business (unless I’m a little, in that case I just follow Phil around and climb on his lap) usually I do some editing or respond to some tweets, THEN he makes dinner, which he practically forces down my throat, then we go for a walk, sometimes to the park sometimes to the toy shop where he buys me something new (I’ve had 2 new stuffies In the past week and a new colouring book) by the time we get home I’m exhausted, so he either puts me to bed or he lets me lie on his chest in the living room, then makes tea, we watch some game of thrones and chill for a-bit before bed time. Day In day out. Everyday. I’m getting bored of it. Why must phil control my life? I’m 24 years old for fuck sake! I should be able to make my own decisions!  
‘Dan? You okay?’ Phils asks, breaking me out of my train of thought. I blink at him.  
‘You spaced out completely.. I said your name twice but you just kept staring at the wall.’ He said  
‘Oh.. I was just thinking’ I say and he sighs.  
‘What’s going on in that head of yours?’ He asks, pulling me to his chest and running his fingers through my hair.  
‘Nothing daddy..’ I murmur.  
‘No lying to me Princess’  
‘Why do you get To control my life?’ I ask and he pauses.  
‘I’m not?’ He questions and I sag against him.  
‘You do.. telling me what to eat and what I can and can’t do with my own body. How is that fair?’  
‘Dan..’ he starts and I pull away from him slightly. I go to stand, but he grabs my wrists and holds tight.  
‘No Daniel, I need to know what’s happening in your head in order to help you.’  
‘I don’t fucking need help!’ I scream, shocking phil. He drops my wrists and I make a run for it.  
‘Dan!’ He cries.  
I run into the bathroom and lock the door, then run the taps loud enough to block any sound from the outside out. Then I slump against to bath and sob.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi so sorry for not uploading much this week!! But I’ve finished the last chapter yesterday and will be uploading it Saturday, then a new fic on Sunday that I just need to edit!!


	9. The end!

Chap 9:

It takes 2 hours for me to calm down and leave the bathroom, and the whole time phil waits outside for me and whispers comforting things to me.   
By the time I come out, I’m red faced with snot and tears all over my face, but I couldn’t care less. I collapse into Phils arms and sob silently while he cries with me and pats my back.   
‘It’s okay princess..’ he mutters and I cry even harder. Why the fuck did I end up with phil? What did I do in life to deserve such an amazing person?   
We stay curled up on the floor for a long time, just cuddling and crying. Eventually phil stands up and pulls me into his chest, running his fingers through my hair, he sighs.  
‘I thought I’d loose you..’ he mutters and I shake my head.  
‘Never..’ I murmur and he just grips me even harder.  
‘I need to be serious here Baby, I know that everything’s really messed up in your head right now’ he gently taps my head then cups my chin and wipes the last of my tears away with his thumb.  
‘But dan, you need food. Okay? Food is important in life, it’s what helps your body grow and heal, and without it, you’ll really damage yourself. Something you’ve been doing for a long time without me knowing. And I hate myself for it. Really. No one should be made to feel like this. Especially you dan. Your such an amazing person and I can’t believe that you feel like this, but I going to help okay? I can’t fix you, only you can do that. And I know you can. But you have to want it dan. Do you want to get better?’ He asks, tilting my chin so I’m staring into his blue orbs. I nod.  
‘Of course I want to get better Philly, do you think I can?’ I ask and he nods.  
‘Of course you can dan, and I’m going to be with you every step of the way.’ 

——  
1 year later:

‘C’mon phil! I’m starving!’ I yell.  
‘I’m coming!’ He yells, but suddenly skids into the hallway and falls on his ass. I burst out laughing.   
‘So you think it’s funny?’ He asks and I gasp as he grabs ahold of my and drags me to the floor.  
‘No phil!’ I gasp but he’s relentless. He grasps my sides and begins to tickle me,I roll around on the floor, laughing and screaming while he attacks me. Somewhere along the way his hands slip under my shirt and his tongue slips into my mouth, dancing away with my tongue. Slowly, ever so slowly, phil lifts my shirt over my head and I end up on his lap. This is the most I’ve let phil touch me since he found out about my eating disorder. I’ve let him hug and kiss me sure, but this? It’s a whole new level.   
I moan gently as phil runs his hands over my nipples and sucks marks into my neck. He knows it’s a weak spot for me.   
‘This okay darling?’ He asks and I nod, too out of breathe to form any words.  
‘I need words sweetheart. Daddies not doing any further till you say the okay’ I nod and take a deep breathe in.  
‘Yes daddy’ I sigh and he leans back into me.  
‘I need you inside me..’ I murmur and he leans back again, I whine at the loss.  
‘You sure?’ He asks, gently intertwining his fingers with mine. I nod.  
‘Okay’ he surges forward, attacking my neck with open mouthed kisses.  
‘I’ve missed his baby boy..’ he whispers, slowly standing me up and backing me into his room. As I land on the bed, I look up at him with innocent eyes.  
‘So have I daddy..’ I whisper...

——  
And the rest you can imagine! ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it is! The end of the story! I hope you’ve all enjoyed this and thank you so much for all the kudos and everyone who’s read it!   
> If your ever struggling then here’s some hotlines to call:  
> England suicide preventation:116 123 (open 24/7 all hours and there’s a website!)  
> Anorexia hotline: 0808 801 0711  
> These hotlines are to help those in need, please use them if your ever struggling with anything, there’s always someone who cares and will listen! I love you all so much <3

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!! So I’ve alresdy written about 5 chapters of this so I will post another one tomorrow!! I’m so sorry this is so short but I just wanted a start to it before we got into the real story.. :)


End file.
